the united states of america

pterodactyl commented on the word the united states of america

Oh, lordy. I love my country, but I really, really hate its name.

Imagine a nice young couple who get married and start a family. These doting parents love their children, so they name them "Girl #1", "Girl #2", and "Boy #1".

Wait, what?! These aren't names, they're descriptions! Those poor kids deserve more than descriptions -- they deserve names. Same goes for countries. Citizens ought to be able to hold up their heads with pride and say "I come from X", where X is a NAME of a PLACE, like "Canada" or "Hungary", or "Kyrgyzstan".

And then there's us. You know those states? In North America? How they're all united and everything? Yeah, them. Well, we don't have a name for them, so let's just call them the "united states" of America.

Gosh darn it. We are going to BEAT this! And in the meantime, if you're looking for us, we'll be over in the corner, commiserating with the United Arab Emirates and the Central African Republic.

August 28, 2009

chained_bear commented on the word the united states of america

Oh man. I'm sorry. I can sympathize and understand this argument, but I think it also goes to the heart of how Americans see themselves.

If we had a name like Hungary or Kyrgyzstan, it would seem to indicate some unity of ethnicity, religion, language, etc. And the citizens of the United States do not have that particular type of unity. We are really good at compartmentalizing ourselves into a billion little groups. But we're also good at thinking of ourselves as one united people: it's a unity of civic ideals: the belief in the idea of the United States, more than any particular ethnic/racial/religious/origins group, is what really makes us Americans.

In that sense, when you think about it, the name's pretty perfect.

Feel free to argue—I'm certainly not trying to quash any strong emotions on the topic. (These sorts of ideas are exactly the sort of thing that will launch me into a full-fledged history dork out.) I often catch myself wistfully imagining another name, but then I feel better about the name when I think about this idea of a civic religion uniting 300 million people—and inspiring countless other millions over the (couple of) centuries. I think the whole thing is pretty neat. :)

On a more pragmatic note... I have always thought that the perfect corporate name is "The Corporation for Public Broadcasting." Thank heaven, it's a company that actually SAYS what it is they're FOR. How can you get any clearer than that? For which reason I do have a soft spot of affection for the Central African Republic.

August 28, 2009

vanishedone commented on the word the united states of america

Hey, some of us live in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland... (It's a description, but at least we manage to slip Great into it.)

August 28, 2009

chained_bear commented on the word the united states of america

True. True.

Ptero, maybe we should consider something like "The Great United States of Greater North America, a.k.a. Great Americastan," or something.

*ponders*

August 29, 2009

hernesheir commented on the word the united states of america

The Untied States of America.

August 29, 2009

milosrdenstvi commented on the word the united states of america

See also my account at ს�?ქ�?რთველ�?.

August 29, 2009

dontcry commented on the word the united states of america

Seeitoldyouitwasntflatistan

August 29, 2009

hernesheir commented on the word the united states of america

The United taStes of America

August 29, 2009

pterodactyl commented on the word the united states of america

Hi chained_bear! Thanks for bracketing history dork out -- it lead me to yeta, a truly excellent page. Yeta helped helped me realize that, no matter what They Might Be Giants say about James K. Polk, he was not a nice man. No siree bob. I hope we can incite many more history dork outs out of you!

Now, to the arguing!

*dons special sparkly Argument Cap*

When I spoke of country names allowing citizens to hold up their heads with pride, it was mostly a rhetorical flourish that came upon me in the heat of my passion, like an attack of the vapours. Of course one can take pride in the phrase "United States of America" -- it is, as you say, a good expression of our national ideals.

However, this lovely phrase is not suited to be a name, in much the same way that a lovely humuhumunukunukuapua'a is not suited to play the alpenhorn. In order to play the alpenhorn, you need to have certain attributes, such as alpenlegs, alpenarms, and a good alpenpucker. Even a very gifted humuhumunukunukuapua'a will not have these things. Far better to leave the poor little fish in the water, don't you think? And remove that tiny lederhosen, too. It's not at all fetching.

When something needs to be referred to frequently and unambiguously, we give it a name. (For example, this is why we name hurricanes. We're not being cutesy, we just need a fast and accurate way to distinguish them from each other.) In order to be a good name, a word or phrase must have certain attributes. It should be should be fairly short, and it should be a proper noun. A descriptive phrase, even an excellent descriptive phrase like "The United States of America", will not have these things.

If we grant that the states are, in fact, united, what are they united into? When the Constructicons united, they formed Devastator, a single unified entity. Clearly, the same is true of the United States. We've created a single big something out of many little somethings. And, this something needs to be referred to frequently and unambiguously. In short, it needs a name.

August 29, 2009

chained_bear commented on the word the united states of america

*loves ptero dearly*

*covets ptero's special sparkly Argument Cap*

*can't stop thinking about a humuhumunukunukuapua'a playing an alpenhorn*

So... what do you think of Seeitoldyouitwasntflatistan?

August 31, 2009

yarb commented on the word the united states of america

I agree, Ptero. But America is how most English-speakers refer to it. That's good enough isn't it?

August 31, 2009

chained_bear commented on the word the united states of america

I prefer Usa. Pronounced Oosa. (See the book Motel of the Mysteries.)

September 1, 2009

pterodactyl commented on the word the united states of america

Usa! I love it! (Does that make us Usans?)

September 1, 2009

dontcry commented on the word the united states of america

*sings* "Oo-oh say can you Seeitoldyouitwasntflatistaaaan..."

September 1, 2009

chained_bear commented on the word the united states of america

I think it does, actually, but I read that book so long ago... Here's a link to it. I think you can view a couple pages online. A most excellent and thought-provoking (yet entertaining) tome.

September 1, 2009

reesetee commented on the word the united states of america

I lurve that book. And God bless the Oosa.

September 1, 2009

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

I remember something about how "united" wasn't capitalized at the beginning of the Declaration of Independence--I think it had "the thirteen united States of America."

November 17, 2010

Prolagus commented on the word the united states of america

True! By the way, I saw one of the Dunlap broadsides at the Morgan Library last Thursday, with sionnach.

November 17, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

What a week you're having, Prolagus--you've gotten to see Sufjan, broadsides, and sionnach. I can't decide whether to be envious or exceedingly happy for you. Maybe both. :-)

November 17, 2010

Prolagus commented on the word the united states of america

Don't be - The only reason why I keep myself busy is █████████████

November 17, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

████████?

November 17, 2010

Prolagus commented on the word the united states of america

It's been months now.

November 17, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

Was there █████ ███? Or was it just ███?

November 17, 2010

Prolagus commented on the word the united states of america

I think there is always at least some ███████.

November 17, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

Well, sure. But does ███████ always have to mean ███████?

November 17, 2010

Prolagus commented on the word the united states of america

OK, maybe it wasn't honest of me to generalize. Let's say that it only applies to me, and that every time things seem to ███████ I end up ██████ ███████ everything.

November 17, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

You shouldn't be so hard on yourself, ██████. If there's one constant in life, it's that ██████ ██████.

November 17, 2010

Prolagus commented on the word the united states of america

That's the ██████ thing anybody has ever told me. It could only come from a ██████ like you. ██████ you, ruzuzu!

November 17, 2010

milosrdenstvi commented on the word the united states of america

This is probably what Keats would call ██████████.

November 17, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

██████ you, too, Prolagus. :-█

I hope you ██████ ██████ and ██████ very soon.

November 17, 2010

Prolagus commented on the word the united states of america

*████s ruzuzu*

November 17, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

*████s Prolagus, Keats, Milosrdenstvi, ptero's special sparkly Argument Cap, this page, and the ████████ USA*

November 17, 2010

chained_bear commented on the word the united states of america

You know, ████████ is probably the single best comment I've seen on Wordie.

November 17, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

*████s chained_bear, too*

November 18, 2010

sionnach commented on the word the united states of america

Gosh, this new modem I was forced to buy to stop the red flashing light and get access to the interwebs is having all kinds of unexpected side effects. My phone line has developed a background wheeze suggestive of Darth Vader with pleurisy, and now it appears to be redacting out key on-screen text, in a disturbingly primitive cold-war kind of way.

Pssst! Prolagus is even more charming in person than online. Hard to believe, I know. But those are the facts. I just report them.

November 18, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

Redacting? Really? I have no idea what you're ████████ about.

However, I am certain that Prolagus must be charming. It makes me very ████████ that you two were able to ████████.

November 18, 2010

marky commented on the word the united states of america

████████

November 18, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

Exactly.

November 18, 2010

reesetee commented on the word the united states of america

Well, if sionnach and Prolagus can manage to meet in real life (as opposed to Wordnik Life), then there's hope for the rest of us. :-D

Besides, as my mother always says, "If you can't ██████ in your ████████, then you might as well just █████ for ███.

November 21, 2010

yarb commented on the word the united states of america

Reesetee, I invite you, and ruzuzuzuzuzuzu and milos and anyone else for that matter, to my cabin in ████████ for ████████ and ██████████. If those ██████████ Prolagus and Sionnach can ████████, we can ████████ better!

November 21, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

██████ yeah! Thanks, yarb.

Would you mind sending me directions? My e-mail address is ruzuzu@█████████.██

November 21, 2010

yarb commented on the word the united states of america

Sorry, I can't send you directions because you accidentally redacted your email address.

November 21, 2010

pterodactyl commented on the word the united states of america

Oh, sorry, yarb, that was me. I'm demonstrating my new invention. I call it The Emperor's New Font. The words that you type in this font are only visible to intelligent, sensitive people who wear trendy clothing and appreciate postmodern art.

Why am I doing this? Simple. I'm the ██████ pte-redact-yl!

November 21, 2010

reesetee commented on the word the united states of america

Ptero, that was the ██████ damn thing I've ever ██████!

Yarb, I'm ████! Here's my Social Security number so you can make me your beneficiary: ████████████. Please don't give it out to anyone.

Ruzuzu, meet me at ██████ and we can drive there together. Who's riding ████████?

November 21, 2010

dontcry commented on the word the united states of america

*how are they doing thaaaaaat?*

November 21, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

Wait--what did you do, pterodactyl? I'm still not seeing it. The only thing I'd ever want to redact would be my PIN for my ATM card, which is XXXX.

Anyway, thanks reesetee--should I bring a box of fufluns and my collection of mixtapes? I've got a lot of klezmer music.

November 21, 2010

Prolagus commented on the word the united states of america

I love klezmer! I think it's the ██████.

November 21, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

You're right, Prolagus. It's definitely the clarinet.

November 22, 2010

pterodactyl commented on the word the united states of america

If you're still not seeing it, ruzuzu, then let me just be the first to compliment you on your trendy clothing.

November 22, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

Thanks for noticing! I did recently purchase a keffiyeh from the Halloween section of my local thrift store. It goes nicely with my tassled loafers, my trucker cap, my smoking jacket, and my Almost Solveig t-shirt (which I wear ironically).

November 22, 2010

reesetee commented on the word the united states of america

How did you guys know it's the clarinet?

November 22, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

I think we hold that truth to be self-evident.

November 22, 2010

reesetee commented on the word the united states of america

That all Zebra finches are created equal?

November 22, 2010

dontcry commented on the word the united states of america

██████

Ha!

November 24, 2010

ruzuzu commented on the word the united states of america

What? I don't get it.

*resumes discussion with tight-jean wearing, big-glasses sporting friends about ORLAN's transhumanism*

November 24, 2010

marky commented on the word the united states of america

ha██.

i don't ███ it.

November 24, 2010

dontcry commented on the word the united states of america

I finally figured out how to ██████ and now I can't stop ███. This morning, Mr dontcry told me to ██████ or he'd ██████ and then I'd really know a day...

██████. I think he's still sore about the ██████ incident.

November 24, 2010

marky commented on the word the united states of america

dont cry.. lol.

November 24, 2010

Prolagus commented on the word the united states of america

Who can blame your ██████ for being sore about the marmite incident...

November 25, 2010

reesetee commented on the word the united states of america

How did you guys know it's marmite?

November 25, 2010

sionnach commented on the word the united states of america